By Haley Young for Wilderdog

Congrats on choosing to save a life and adopting a rescue dog! You probably can’t wait to hit your favorite trails, schedule playdates with your neighbors’ pups, and invite family and friends over for a “welcome home” party. It’s time to introduce your new addition to the big beautiful world!

Well, not quite. Hold up just a second.

Many rescue dogs have just been through a journey. They’re not quite sure who you are, where they are, and how long they’ll be with you. Their worlds have been turned upside down—maybe two or three or four times already—and coming into your home is a big adjustment.

When I adopted my blue heeler, Scout, she felt nervous about anything unfamiliar. Her hesitation made daily tasks (not to mention the grand adventures of my dog ownership dreams) difficult, and because I couldn’t wait for her to be the “active companion” I wanted, I pushed her too far too fast. Rushing only made things slower.

Now, years later, we live in a converted van, and Scout’s transformed into a bold and brave companion. (You have not seen joy, my partner insists, until you’ve watched her leap out the sliding door into a desert sunrise.) But I couldn’t snap my fingers to suddenly find a bona fide adventure dog on the other end of my leash. We had to gradually create space, confidence, and opportunities for her to push past her own comfort zone.

Enter the 3/3/3 rule:

(Graphic courtesy of Ruff Start Rescue)

Set reasonable expectations with the 3/3/3 framework

Many shelters and animal welfare organizations recommend following a protocol called the “3/3/3 Rule” to set adoptees up for success. Staff at the Longmont Humane Society describe the 3/3/3 rule as a guideline for transitioning rescue dogs into a new environment. They suggest your adoptee's first three days be used for decompression, the next three weeks for learning your routines, and the first three months for feeling at home—at which point you can work on more specific socialization and training.

This framework “is important because it emphasizes the need for patience, consistency, and positive reinforcement when bringing home a newly adopted dog,” adds the Humane Society of North Texas.

(Note: The exact timeline of three days, three weeks, and three months is only a guideline. Each pet’s adjustment period varies in length and intensity! Scout, for example, did not confidently play with me outside until more than a full year after her adoption. Focus on your individual dog’s progress over time instead of comparing your schedule to other pets you know.)

The first three days: Decompression

Your dog might feel overwhelmed, act timid, and not yet show their true self. Stay patient and positive.

When you bring your rescue dog home, your initial goal should be simple: Let them adjust to their surroundings. Whether you know every detail about your new pup’s past or have no idea where they’ve been, what matters now is that they’re with you—and that you give them space to settle in.

• Set up a quiet area where your companion can relax, away from walkways and other areas of commotion. Covered crates can be great if your pup feels comfortable in them—if not, larger X-pens or separate rooms work well too. Make sure your new dog has a comfy bed away from other animals and children.

• Avoid asking much of your new dog for the first few days. Don’t host a big gathering, or thrust them into on-leash greetings with other people and pets. This isn’t the time to start precise obedience training, either.

• Let go of long-term expectations and training goals—just for the moment—and observe your new family member without judgment. Bit by bit they’ll start to show you who they are.

The first three weeks: Learning new routines

Your dog might settle in, feel more comfortable, and begin showing their true personality. Praise every success!

As your rescue dog comes out of their shell, they’ll start getting used to your home’s unique routines. Then it’s time to have a little more fun!

• Keep your new dog’s “safe space” intact as they continue adjusting to your home.

• Start introducing your pup to the other pets and people you love. Remember that an uneventful neutral experience is better than a negative one. It’s okay if your dog doesn’t immediately become best buds with all your own close friends. Aim for coexistence first, and build from there.

• See how they respond to various low-pressure activities like easy training games, sniffy walks, and enrichment puzzles.

• Lay the foundation for basic training skills. This might look like “loading” a marker word (a sound like a clicker, “yes,” or “good” that lets your dog know they did the right behavior and a reward is coming) or simply building name recognition by giving your pup a treat when you say their name.

• Start exploring the activities you hope to share with your dog throughout your life together. Work slowly toward more overwhelming environments. If your dog responds well to a quiet nature walk, you might try a busier trail next time. Just don’t jump to the “hardest” version of your favorite adventures right away!

The first three months: Starting to feel truly at home

Your dog should start feeling comfortable in their new home, and you can continue building your bond.

Have you heard of the “honeymoon period” in new romantic relationships? Dog trainers and shelter workers sometimes observe a similar phenomenon with new rescue dogs. Meg McIntire at Friends of Animals says the honeymoon period “is when the dog is feeling out his or her surroundings and the new rules before being comfortable enough to express certain sides of their personalities you hadn’t planned for.” This phase usually lasts from one to three weeks (but depending on your new pup’s background, personality, and other environmental factors, it might take even longer).

Here’s what that means for the 3/3/3 framework: This last adjustment stage is when your rescue dog starts really showing you who they are. You might notice undesirable behaviors they didn’t display earlier, or they might regress with an unexpected fear period. Don’t worry. These experiences are normal. The more your pup offers their true personality, the better you can integrate them into your daily life—in a way that feels right for both of you.

• Identify the skills you most want to work on with your new dog. (Common examples include loose-leash walking, a solid off-leash recall, or the ability to hold a sit/down stay around distractions.) Start focused training sessions toward these goals.

• Figure out what styles of play your pup loves. Knowledge of your dog’s breed(s) can be a helpful starting point here—retrievers often love carrying things in their mouths, terriers feel compelled to chase fast objects, herders enjoy controlling movement. It’s worth experimenting to discover what your own pup loves best! (Scout’s a voracious tugger, but she also gets excited about any variation of hide and seek. Sometimes my partner and I put her in a sit stay, duck behind trees or rocks on a hike, and call her to us. Her tail goes wild.)

• Continue socializing and trying new things.

Remember your rescue dog needs supported exposure

We often hear that uncertain dogs need more exposure to the world around them. It’s true that sitting inside, deprived of new experiences, doesn’t do them any good—but what’s sometimes left out of that advice is the kind of exposure. Our dogs need to feel supported and safe, not alone in the deep end.

• In supported exposure, you introduce your dog to novel stimuli—anything (or anyone) that’s unfamiliar and might make them feel nervous—while making sure they know you have their back.

• If your dog shows you they’re afraid of something, supporting them does not mean you freak out yourself or immediately flee the situation. It just means you pay attention to their emotions.

• This might look like making a little distance from something scary or calmly investigating an unnerving stimulus on your own without forcing your dog to get any closer. (The latter is an example of “observational learning,” an excellent way to not only teach your dog new things but also deepen your relationship.)

Why play is so important to help rescue dogs settle in

Domestic dogs evolved to live with humans, and our species share something pretty unusual in the animal kingdom: We stay playful into adulthood. Fear and play are incompatible—it’s hard to feel properly silly when we’re scared—so playful behavior can be a great gauge of our dogs’ mental states.

We taught Scout to push through discomfort for the sake of a larger goal (like retrieving a favorite ball from a clump of suspicious bushes). Over time she realized that challenges don’t have to be terrifying. They can be fulfilling!

And while playing a game? Our dogs can observe the environment without fixating on it. This is a form of passive desensitization perfect for new dogs getting used to their surroundings. For example: The ocean overwhelmed Scout on our first beach trip. By playing tug at increasingly close distances to the waves, we helped her take in information about the things happening around her—and realize they weren’t a big deal—with less stress.

• Play can take many forms. At its core, it’s about activating your dog’s curiosity and engaging with them socially. There’s no single “right” approach.

• Play can take time to build. Just because your dog doesn’t show interest in a particular type of game right away doesn’t mean they won’t love it when they get more comfortable.

Here’s to your future adventures!

Not every dog will love every activity. (Just like people!) But by taking your time, prioritizing fun, and providing consistent support, you can help your new rescue dog’s real personality shine. Soon they’ll be able to explore, experiment, and enjoy the world in their own way. Stay patient!

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Haley Young is a freelance writer specializing in domestic dogs: their training, fulfillment, and relationships with the people who love them. She travels full-time in a converted van with her rescued blue heeler, Scout.